October 2011
im trying so hard to forget about you but everything reminds me of you. i miss you so much. i miss how happy you made me. whenever something was wrong, you always knew the perfect things to say to make me feel better. i miss being able to tell you anything and you would understand me. i dont even miss our relationship, what i miss most is you just being there. i miss the feeling of knowing i will always have someone by my side not matter what happens. you knew me better than anyone else and i could completely open up to you. i miss being like that with people. i miss feeling completely comfortable around someone. i miss who i was when i was with you. its hard to be myself around people, but with you it was all so easy. it made everything so much better. i always think about how we would lay down and just talk about everything. those were my favorite memories. i loved knowing that i could actually trust someone and someone could trust me. i miss feeling like i wasnt alone. i miss just being around you. i miss being in your arms. i miss feeling your love. you really did make me feel special. i wish i could just let go of it all but its so hard when all of my happiest memories involve you. its so hard to forget everything when its everything that fills up my heart. i feel so stupid for missing you because i know your happy with someone else and you probably dont ever think about me. i feel so stupid for being caught up on all of this when you made it so easy to walk away. i wish i was one of those people that can just move on but i get attatched to everything. yeah. its getting better, but it will always hurt. it hurts because i love you. i wish i didnt, but i did once and i probably always will. as much as i know it was for the best, there will always be a part of me that wishes everything worked out in the end. it just sucks how everything changed, simple as that.